It’s time to spunk up all over this month’s big remixer courtesy of that man from the Ministry and his jollyo 13th Planet Records. Yep Uncle Al is at it again, creaming the loose change out of your pocket and jiggling those hairy balls for good measure with some funky beats and homo treats from this years earlier ‘Sex-O Olympic-O’ album. For those of us in London we can but wish we had an event like this coming our way in 2012 rather than the huge waste of money that we are saddled with. You can imagine the events now, pole dancing and titty twisting, leg splaying and porno posing, strip teasing and thong tugging, tassel twirling and spam javelin hurling; sounds like a lot of fun for sure.
As with the Ministry remix album that I covered last month, this sees different reinterpretations of each and every song on the last RevCo album, in the order they appeared and a pretty diverse lot they are too. It’s a big old free for all with some unlikely candidates stepping up to the decks and putting them through their paces and we start off with ‘HookerBot3000 (tweaker mix)’ in minimalist futurist, retro-fashion courtesy of Chris Vrenna of Marilyn Manson. It sounds to me like that boys been busy pulling one off at the strip show to some very old Human League songs and of course that’s no bad thing at all, as it’s made this cum out all jiggy, jokey and pig in a pokey and it’s bound to get you doing the shuffle, 5 knuckle or otherwise. Moving on swiftly we get a treatment for those nasty diseases that songs like this can no doubt result in from Crabbi (see what I did there) of Pop Will Eat Itself and the Vileevils (now doesn’t that make you want to cream some)? He gives ‘Keys To The City (Invincible mix)’ a nice funky, bass heavy workout that suddenly remembers it had a glam backbone up it’s butt and goes all Gary (errrr) on its shitter, no bum notes here kids.
You should by now of course know each and every one of these hairy palmed originals from before they were touched up and fingered by people such as Doug Firley of Gravity Kills (does anyone remember them and would they even admit it)? I do like getting my gob around a bit of gabba and that’s just what good ol’boy Clayton Worbeck of RevCo does with ‘Cousins (Sexy Problems = Sexy Solutions mix).’ I still reckon this sounds like a particularly camp Gene Loves Jezebel song especially when he makes it go all Eurodisco. You need to stick those shuttlecocks down the latex shorts and make sure there’s a glitterball hanging off the ceiling baby and this will have you going all night. Of course having written this I want to point out ‘I’m Not Gay’ and can do so thanks to Dave ‘Skinny Puppy’ Ogilvie who gives it the old ‘(I'm So Gay Club mix).’ This is one tranced out version that is not in the slightest homo and it’s a man’s mix for all those construction workers out there in downtown spreadassholeville. It wouldn’t be quite right to leave this without mentioning Combichrist especially as Andy LePlegua tweaks the nuts off ‘Lewd Ferrigno (Club On mix).’
I don’t know what it is about this disc but it’s made me come over all queer and it seems to have got rather hot in here all of a sudden. I should hasten to add that everything going down (ooh err) on this disc is completely tongue in cheek and as one old and sadly deceased queen would have no doubt said, “It’s all done in the best possible taste.” If that’s not to your liking then frankly you can go touch yourself!
Now bring your LubricTour over to the UK, Douglas Hurd is long gone you big mincing pussies!
http://www.myspace.com/revoltingcocks
